Tag Archive: Video Game


Silent Hill: Revelation (2012)

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The town of Silent Hill is like any other small berg in America: a regal main street, family owned businesses and a portal to a hellish alternate dimension that opens every night.  Oh, and don’t forget that constant fog and falling ash that we all love about our small towns.   Young Heather was born is this awful place, but was taken away by her father Harry (Sean Bean); and ever since then she has been having nightmare about the town wanting her back… which it does.  So far, moving from town to town and changing their names has kept the townspeople from tracking them down, but that is all about to change now that her new boyfriend (Kit Harrington) is revealed to actually be from Silent Hill.

Although he swears that he only wants to help Heather, her new beau has unwittingly gotten her father captured by the townsfolk in an effort to lure her back to Silent Hill.  Of course their plan works, as she travels back to Hellville to find her daddy.  As night falls, the buildings seem to crumble and rot before her eyes as the monsters and whatnot come out to wreak havoc.  She encounters horrific creatures that would enjoying nothing more than to eat her or chop her into bits, and must escape them and find her dad before the town takes her back.

Alex’s Thoughts:   I have never played any of the Silent Hill games or seen the first movie, and would therefore not consider myself to be a fan of the series, but that didn’t keep me from enjoying this one.  I was in the mood for a horror flick and found this on Netflix, and expected to be disappointed, but for once I was surprised.  It isn’t great or anything, but the effects are good and most of the creatures are all practical make-up, which I appreciate.  It also helped that I am a huge Game of Thrones fan, so having Eddard Stark and Jon Snow on the screen together in something else was fun for me.  And yes, Sean Bean dies a horrific death, although it is only in a dream, but he keeps he streak of dying in his roles alive (pun intended).  Fans of the series seem to have different opinions on this movie, but as a casual viewer and fan or the horror genre, I would recommend it, as it is something different from all the haunting and possession flicks that have been forced on us lately.  Alex Rates This Movie 7.5/10

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View the IMDB entry for this movie here,

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Finish Him!!

Mortal Kombat (1995) w/ Guest Reviewer David Alabaugh

This flick loosly follows the events of the first Mortal Kombat game: the wizard Shang Tsung is holding a tournament that pits the people of earth against his mystic warriors of Outworld.  Should the fighters from Outworld win the tourney, they will gain control of Earth and turn everyone into their slaves.  It is up to the long-haired fallen monk Lui Kang, the worst actress ever (and we guess some kind of cop) Sonya Blade and fallen movie star Johnny Cage to win to keep Earth safe; but their not alone; Christopher Lambert needed some cash so he shows up as a scenery-chewing (and white?) Raiden to help guide them on their way.  As they fight classic game characters like the ice chucking Sub-Zero, the skeletal Scorpion and giant shitty animatronics Goro, it falls on Liu Kang to win the whole enchilada while random soundtrack phrases are uttered and in-game references appear for no reason whatsoever. 

Alex’s Thoughts:  If you were a kid in the mid-90’s this movie was the shit.  I saw this in the theatre three times, as I was a huge fan of the game; I had never seen anything like that game before.  Watching it now I am embarrassed for 16 year-old Alex… poor ignorant bastard.  This movie doesn’t hold up well at all; it is packed chockfull of shit acting and even shittier martial arts.  Everyone working on this movie just seems like they would rather be somewhere else.   If you have never seen it before or are not a fan of the game, you will want to pass, it’s just a cash grab and a big-budget commercial for a video game.  The sequel is a bit better, but still not good.  Alex Rates This Movie 3/10

Tim’s Thoughts: Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. I wanted to like this so much, and as a kid I was crazy excited, but then  a very white Christopher Lambert shows up as an Asian god, and I checked out. This movie is such crap, nonstop crap, and I am filled with rage at the thought. I loved the first couple Mortal Kombat games, and this franchise seemed like it could translate to a couple of no-brainer action flicks, but instead thanks to horrible casting and unneeded tweaking this movie stinks.  I hated it as a kid, and I still do, nice soundtrack though.   Tim Rates This Movie 2/10

David’s Thoughts: Of all my favorite childhood movies, most of them are still great flicks, but when it comes to Mortal Kombat…I don’t know what I was thinking. I guess I liked the action, even though by today’s standards, it’s extremely outdated when it comes to style and just simply put, “Awesomeness.” Instead the action scenes are like that of Walker Texas Ranger (without Chuck Norris), consisting of bland one-two punches followed by a roundhouse kick. If you’re looking for fantastic martial arts, MK’s not for you. I do however like the casting choices, for the most part. They all fit pretty well, and Johnny Cage’s one liners still cracked me up, even though it was for stupidity rather than cleverness. Goro looks ridiculous, and the computer animated reptile is pretty horrible, but that shouldn’t come as a huge shocker, considering this movie came out in the 90’s. I am a proud and true Mortal Kombat (the game series) fan, and bought this movie on Blu-Ray to receive bonus material for the newest (and best) MK game released. Was it worth it? No. This movie, even though the story and characters stay somewhat true to the game, lacked the one thing that put Mortal Kombat on the map. Blood, Guts, and over-the-top Gore. Missing out on the extremely violent fatalities is a huge slap in the face to fans, and makes the movie completely miss the point. That’s unforgivable. So, if you want a good MK story, play story mode on the new game, it’s infinity times better. FINISH HIM!!! David Rates This Movie 3/10. FATALITY!!!

“You’ll fight me. I am Liu Kang, descendent of Kung Lao. I challenge you to Mortal Kombat.”

View the IMDB entry for this movie here or add it to you Netflix queue

Street Fighter (1994)

Evil General M. Bison (Raul Julia) has captured a group of civilians and is holding them for ransom.  It is up to a group of soldiers led by Col. Guile (Van Damme) to save them in the next three days or they will be executed.  As Guile’s forces work on a plan, all of the characters in the video game are introduced in a 5-minute span.  The next few scenes involve heroes Ken & Ryu meeting up with the gun runner Sagat and his fancy lad Vega, while reporter Chung Li and her crew of Balrog and Honda try to go undercover and stop Bison.  If you don’t know who any of these people are, don’t feel bad.  You were fortunate that you didn’t have to watch this movie, or play the video game as a kid.  We wish we could give you more information on the plot, but sadly there isn’t much to speak of.  Anyway, everyone ends up fighting at Bison’s headquarters and does their signature fight moves from the game as evil is defeated.  Hurray!  Groan….

Alex’s Thoughts:  How do you get people to agree to be in a movie like this?  I’m sure money isn’t enough, you’d have to threaten their families or something.  The story is what it is; the game didn’t really have a plot, so they did the best they could. Fine.  But the acting… sweet shit is it bad.  The background characters are fine, they just have to sit there and look like their video game counterparts; but the main actors… come one.  Van Damme, I know you’re not Clark Gable, but at least try dammit.  That might be the most phoned-in performance I’ve seen in a while.  And Raul Julia, shame on you; this was your final role and I’m sure it is because this movie killed you.  If you’re an 11-year-old boy this movie is right up your alley. If you have a vagina or any common sense, you will stay away.  Actually, if you are 11 you probably shouldn’t be reading this, as we use the word ‘fuck’ quite a bit… you little fucker.   Alex Rates This Movie 3/10

Tim’s Thoughts:  As a kid and an avid video gamer, I was sooooo excited about this movie, but alas I was young and had no idea that video game movies were almost never a good thing. I saw this in the theater, and as a 16 year old, I was ready to walk out of my first movie. Somehow I didn’t and I think it was due to my optimistic nature, thinking that surely it has to get better…..I couldn’t have been more wrong. It’s just a mish-mash of characters that you should be familiar with, and very little street fighting.  The acting is worse than what you could expect, and the lack of a plot doesn’t help. This was one of the first movies that as a kid, I was thinking, this is awful. Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, with no redeeming qualities…..   Tim Rates This Movie 1/10

“It’s the Collection Agency, Bison. Your ass is six months over due, and it’s mine.”

View the IMDB entry for this movie here or add it to you Netflix queue