Jack Frost (1996)

After being caught by a local sheriff, a serial killer by the name of Jack Frost, swears revenge against him and his family.  Luckily for the sheriff, Jack is going to fry for the dozens of murders he committed.  As he is being transported for execution, the van Jack is riding in collides with a truck carrying some sort of genetic altering acid, and Jack is covered with that as his body melts into the snow and somehow bonds with it. So now we have a patch of snow with a killer’s DNA fused within, so logically it takes the form of a seven-foot-tall snowman and goes back to the small town where he was caught.

Luckily for Jack, everyone in that town, including the cops, are a bunch of idiots, and he is free to murder people as he likes.  He also apparently rapes a young pre-breast-augmented Shannon Elizabeth in a bathtub.  The witnesses are deemed insane for thinking a snowman could be causing all of these murders. It isn’t until the sheriff sees it for himself that he starts to act.  The town’s people fight back with hairdryers and melt the bastard, but forget that it is 20 below outside so he quickly reforms.  It isn’t until he is thrown into a vat of anti-freeze that he is put down for good… or at least until the sequel.

Alex’s Thoughts:  First off, the snowman isn’t as evil looking as the movie poster would have you believe, he looks just like Frosty. This is as awful as it sounds, and as bad as I remember it.  I don’t think this movie has any redeeming qualities, other than the fact that it is a total dumpster fire and is fun to watch to make fun of it.  I get that it is low budget and corny, but at times it tries to take itself too seriously and forgets that it is a movie about a KILLER SNOWMAN!  Remember your place filmmakers.  It lacks all the charm and good acting of movie with the same premise, such as Child’s Play.  If you want to laugh at how bad a movie can be, than check out this crappy pun filled bomb.  Alex Rates This Movie 1/10

Tim’s Thoughts: This is typical of the usual straight to video turds that came out in the 90’s. It’s terrible, and there is nothing that I can say that Alex hasn’t already put out there, but I guess there is one thing. The scene where Shannon Elizabeth gets killed is pretty damn funny, but not due to the filmmakers efforts, in spite of them. It looks so awful, and her acting is so terrible, that you can’t help but laugh, and you need to see to believe. So watch those 2 minutes and get the hell out. Tim Rates This Movie 1/10

View the IMDB entry for this movie here, or add it to your netflix queue.

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