Labyrinth (1986)

Sarah (Jennifer Connelly) is baby-sitting her brother Toby (that’s is his slave name by the way), when she can no longer put up with his crying and calls upon the goblin king Jareth (David Bowie) to take him away.  She puts him down and doesn’t think anything of the words she just spoke, since they are from a fairy tale anyway; that is until Toby finally shuts his screaming yap.  She goes to check on him, but alas, he has been taken.  Let’s think about that..  a grown man covered in glitter with crazy hair and a codpiece just stole a baby boy out of his crib.  Does Sarah call the cops and bust this pedo? Nope.  She agrees to try to make it through Jareth’s labyrinth all the way to his castle in 13 hours; then he will gladly give the kid back.  What could go wrong?

As she begins her journey she meets a troll peeing in a pond; who when finished peeing doesn’t watch his hands, which is gross because later he touching a piece of fruit that Sarah eats and now she has Troll AIDS.  The troll, whose named Hoggle, agrees to take her to the castle in exchange for a plastic bracelet.  They traverse the maze and find many odd creatures along the way; eventually gaining some friends in the giant monster Ludo and a dog-riding fox named Sir Didymus, who to help her reach the castle.  They make their way to the goblin city just outside the castle walls where they battle an army of inept goblins.  As Ludo speaks to rocks and has them attack the goblins, Sarah makes her way up to the castle; and finds Toby in a room that would give M.C. Escher vertigo.  She tells Jareth that he holds no power over her and just like that, she is home.  She wakes up in her bed, all safe and sound.  As she sits in her room, she sees her new friends in the mirror as she says she will not forget about them.  A large group of creatures then proceed to have a dance party in her room.  Also in attendance are several creatures that tried to kill her, so I bet that was sort of awkward.

Alex’s Thoughts:  God bless you Jim Henson, you were a true visionary and a talent.  I hadn’t seen this movie in over ten years, but I still remembered every line of dialog and every scene.  That doesn’t happen too often, so this movie must have made a great impression on me when I was a kid.  As an adult it is still enjoyable (despite the very 80’s musical score), and I had a fun time watching it, though I could do without a few of the songs and the ballroom scene.  This movie was pretty expensive at the time, but it shows in the details with unique character designs and great puppeteering.  I can’t wait to have my son watch this with me  in a few years so we can enjoy it together.  Alex Rates This Movie 9/10

Tim’s Thoughts:  They don’t make them like this anymore. From the incredible cast of Muppet creatures, to the great music, and talents of David Bowie, this movie is timeless, and I hope that they NEVER try to remake it. Yes it can run a bit long sometimes, but overall this movie is incredible. I am hoping that Muppet movies can make a come back with Jason Segal’s help, and we can have more films of this ilk for future generations. As someone who is about to be a Dad, like Alex, I can’t wait to watch this with my kids. Tim Rates this Movie 9/10

“So, the Labyrinth is a piece of cake, is it? Well, let’s see how you deal with this little slice… “

View the IMDB entry for this movie here or add it to your Netflix queue