Hudson Hawk

Release Date: 5/24/1991 – Rated R

Starring: Bruce Willis (The Fifth Element), Andie MacDowell (Groundhog Day )

Plot Summary:  Hudson Hawk was the world’s greatest cat burgler; at least he was ten years ago before he spent a decade in the clink, maybe or maybe not getting butt-raped.  But now he’s out and trying to go straight, and  that is going to be difficult with his parole officer and some mobsters (one of which is Frank Stallone) blackmailing him to steal something for them from an auction house.  Without much of an option he takes the job, and along with his former crime partner Tommy Five-Tone, succeed in stealing a Di Vinci sculpture.  His new employers are dispatched my agents of their employer – Darwin and Minerva Mayflower… an insane couple who quest for world domination.  The horse contains a crystal, that when combined with two other crystals is used in a machine that turns lead into gold.  The Mayflowers, along with a special CIA force with agents named after candy bars, get Hudson to go to Rome to steal the other two Di Vinci artifacts that contain the other two gold-making machine crystals.   He ends up stealing a sketchbook and a helicopter model that contain the other two pieces; and as expected everyone double-crosses eath other while the gold-making machine blows up and Hudson and his nun girlfriend escape just in time.

Alex’s Thoughts:  There is no reason this movie should be any good, it’s ridiculous, campy and just plain dumb, but for some reason it works for me.  Bruce Willis is a really good comedic actor, and you can still see that in his dry sense of humor in his current roles.  This was a crazy expensive movie to make, and it ended up losing 53 million dollars at the box office, so I’m sure it still get some bad press to this day for that.  I think it’s just a fun movie with lots of funny quips and some classic camp.  Give it a chance, you might like it.

Tim’s Thoughts: This movie is stupid, implausible, idiotic, over the top, and hammy, and that’s what makes it good. It’s obvious how much fun the cast had making this movie, and despite being a box office flop, it has a pretty substantial following. I hate some of the goofy sound effects here and there, but it does fit in with everything else being so damn cheesy. Despite all of this, I really enjoy it every time I see it, and I will always watch Bruce Willis in a comedy. If you hate it, you hate it, but if you haven’t seen it, you may like it. Don’t put too much on this, just pop some corn, open a beer/soda and enjoy.

Final Thoughts:  This is the kind of movie where either you love it our you hate it.  We love it.  It’s one of our guilty pleasures, like clown porn or needle point.  It was a complete failure at the box office, but is still really enjoyable and has some great moments.

Alex Rates This Movie 8/10

Tim Rates This Movie 8/10

“You New York Italian, father-made-twenty-bucks-a-week son of a bitch.”

View the IMDB entry for this movie here or add it to your Netflix queue